


These Five Words I Swear to You

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Drama, F/M, Friendship/Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-07
Updated: 2015-12-07
Packaged: 2018-05-05 11:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5373266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“But there is no one I'd rather die on a cold floor with than you, Olivia Benson.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	These Five Words I Swear to You

**Author's Note:**

> I was in the mood to write tonight but my mind was buzzing and I couldn’t hear the characters. I sent out a call on Tumblr for prompts and Anonymous sent me ‘Barba gets into an accident of some sort or is shot’. This is what I came up with. Also, the title doesn’t really have to do with the story but I was listening to Bon Jovi earlier so…

“Carmen!” Liv rushed into the emergency room and over to the paralegal. 

It was a rainy Wednesday afternoon and the ER was crowded. Chaos wasn’t the word Liv would use to describe it but it was close. Carmen looked troubled, like she was trying to hold it together but was steps from losing it. Liv knew the feeling. As soon as she saw the text her heart leapt into her throat. It said _Rafael rushed to the hospital. We don’t know what's wrong_. 

Liv was smack in the middle of a case; she and Nick were talking to a reluctant witness. Walking away from her job was not on the list of things to do in this situation. But as soon as Nick saw her face and the text, that’s exactly what he told her to do. If Olivia could've run there she would've. Instead she put on her sirens and got to New York-Presbyterian as fast as she could.

“He's in surgery.” Carmen said.

“Surgery? What happened?”

“He collapsed in the office. He complained of pain in his stomach and side right before he went down. There were tissues with blood on them in his trash can. I don’t know what happened.”

“Did anyone tell you anything? Liv asked.

“He was rushed into surgery as soon as the ambulance got here. I was able to ride on the ambulance but after that they shut me out. You were the only person I thought to call; you two are good friends. I didn’t feel comfortable calling his mother…I didn’t want to upset her. He just lost his grandmother a few months ago.”

“OK,” Liv nodded. “OK, we need to find out what's going on.”

She walked over to the help desk, Carmen right beside her. The man was on the phone but as soon as he was off, Liv inquired about Rafael Barba.

“Are you a family member?” the man asked.

“I'm his wife.” Liv said. She held out her badge. “I'm also a Sergeant with the NYPD. He was brought in by ambulance and rushed into surgery.”

“About a half hour ago.” Carmen said.

The man nodded and started typing on his keyboard. Liv noticed Carmen was looking at her, not sure to believe her story or not.

“Rafael Barba is in surgery.” He said.

“What happened to him?” Carmen asked.

“Um, ruptured appendix, according to the chart, and possible internal hemorrhaging. It makes no record of where he may be placed after surgery but most emergency surgeries go to the 6th floor for post-op care. You have to leave out of this building, go next door and up six floors. Someone at the nurse’s station there could have more information for you.”

“Thanks.”

Olivia and Carmen went over to the hospital and got on the elevator. They didn’t speak to each other, didn’t want to know what the other was thinking. The doors finally opened before Olivia said anything.

“Had he been complaining of not feeling well before today?” Liv asked.

“No.” Carmen shook her head. “You know he hates being sick. It happened really fast, Olivia. One minute he was going into his office like normal, the next he was stumbling around in pain. If anything was a problem he was keeping it to himself.”

“OK. Excuse me?” She walked over to the nurse’s station. “Rafael Barba was brought in for emergency surgery and I was told he could be brought to this floor after. I'm his wife.”

“Hold on just a minute.” The nurse looked into the computer. “He's still in surgery but there is a note for a sixth floor post-op bed.”

“Is it possible someone can tell me what's happening? All I know is that he collapsed at work; I need to know more than that.”

“They should've immediately gotten the attending for you, Mrs. Barba.” The nurse wasn’t pleased. “I’ll call down and see what I can find out. The waiting room is right down the hall…someone will come and give you some information as soon as possible.”

“Thank you.”

“I have to ask…” Carmen said as they walked down the hall.

“We promised each other if anything bad happened that we would be spouses.” Liv said. “He never wanted his mother to get the bad news from the police or the hospital. I understood where he was coming from. She doesn’t know me but it’s still better.”

“So you're his next of kin?”

“I am.” She nodded.

“And you're comfortable with that? I know you two are friends, but…”

“My parents are dead, I'm not married, and the only family I have is Noah. You don't want to think about it but you have to, especially in my line of work. I need someone who cares about me but would also be able to think straight in a time of crisis. Barba was thinking the same thing I'm sure.”

“ _Would it be very strange if I asked you to be my next of kin?” he sipped his scotch and watched the people walk outside the window. They usually just sat at the bar in this place but it was packed tonight. So they grabbed a small table. It had to be above fire capacity tonight for some reason. If the shit hit the fan Rafael had already seen two possible exits._

_“A little. Are you alright?”_

_“I realized that none of my paperwork is up to date. After what happened in the courtroom, with Johnny D…I need to know that if something happens to me someone will be there.”_

_“OK.” Liv nodded._

_“OK like I hear you or OK like this might not be such a strange and bad idea?”_

_“If you didn’t ask me, who would you ask Barba?”_

_“There's a couple of people but I know I can trust you. I know you can make the right decision under pressure and even in grief. At least where I was concerned. You don’t have to do it,” Rafael held up his hand. “It’s a lot and I get that. I just remembered that things can happen at a moment’s notice. Having those kinds of procedures in place can make the difference in saving your life.”_

_“What if we’re shot together?” Liv asked._

_“Then we’re screwed.” He smiled. “But there is no one I'd rather die on a cold floor with than you, Olivia Benson.”_

_“That’s probably the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.” She held up her wine glass. “I’ll drink to that_.”

“Mrs. Barba?” a nurse walked into the waiting room.

Olivia and Carmen both stood. They were trying to tell what she was going to say from the look on her face. She didn’t look grave but wasn’t happy either. Were nurses ever happy, at least when it came to talking to someone’s family?

“Mr. Barba is still in surgery but they expect to be finished soon. He had a ruptured appendix and there was some internal bleeding from possible stomach ulcers; I don’t have all the information on that right now. The doctors are working hard to get everything fixed…he was a very sick man when the ambulance brought him in this morning. As soon as the surgery is over one of the doctors will come and speak with you. They know that you're waiting for more information.”

“Thank you.” Liv said, still not pleased that there was nothing else for them to be told. 

Bleeding ulcers? Ruptured appendix? If he wasn’t so injured she would kill Rafael when she got her hands on him. There was no way that he wasn’t feeling out of sorts. She'd just seen him two days ago. They were arguing over how to proceed with a complicated case.

“ _Alright, you win.” He sighed, leaning back in his chair with a grimace._

_“I don’t want to win, Barba, I want this guy in jail. The victims are willing to testify.”_

_“I hear you. I just don’t know if it’s possible to get a jury to believe the word of a sex worker.”_

_“What about 5 sex workers?” Liv asked. “He's a predator and men like him escalate. The next time someone is going to end up dead. We shouldn’t just pay attention if it’s a housewife or a school teacher.”_

_“I know, I know.”_

_“Are you alright?”_

_“What do you mean?” Rafael countered._

_“You look a little green around the gills.” Liv replied._

_“I'm fine. Slightly overwhelmed but fine. Do you think I'm too old for this?”_

_“Being a lawyer?” she raised an eyebrow._

_“No, I mean the DA’s office. A lot of young lawyers use it as a stepping stone to private practice or burn out. I'm still here.”_

_“And we’re all the better for it.”_

_“All of us? I work 60 hours a week usually.”_

_“Me too. Do you want to go and get a drink?”_

_“I'm actually going home tonight and falling into bed. I think 10 hours of sleep may be just what I need. Get the victims ready Liv; we’re going to have a hell of a fight on our hands at every step in this case_.”

***

“Hey there.” Liv smiled when Rafael opened his eyes.

“Hey.” He tried to smile. “Why do I feel like I got hit by a cab?”

“You had emergency surgery, ruptured appendix and some bleeding ulcers.”

“Are you serious?” he tried to sit up and immediately regretted it. “OK, you're serious.”

“Rafael, you cannot ignore symptoms like that. A ruptured appendix could've killed you. The bleeding ulcers could cause infection. I don’t want to hear that there were no symptoms because there had to be a symptom of something and you should've gone to see a doctor. If you ever, ever scare me like that again I will kill you myself.”

“What happened?”

“You coughed up blood and passed out at the office this morning.” Liv sat in the chair beside the hospital bed. “Carmen called an ambulance and they brought you here.”

“Is Carmen alright?”

“She's OK. She went back to the office to let them know you were OK. I'm sure she’ll stop by later to see for herself. She texted me when the ambulance came. Your next of kin needed to be here for this.”

“You left work?” Rafael asked.

“Stop talking, Counselor.” Liv shook her head. “Of course I left work.”

Rafael wanted to know where his clothes were. He was petrified they had to cut them off and that was one of his favorite ties. If he asked Liv and she told them that they'd been destroyed he was going to lose it. She was also probably going to yell at him for caring more about his ties than his life. 

OK, he'd ignored a few pains in his side…thought it might be stress. OK, he had some stool that was surely the wrong color but he ignored that too. How could he be so stupid? He could've died this afternoon. How was a doctor going to explain to his mother than his death was 100% preventable? Rafael promised himself he would never blatantly ignore symptoms again. Yes, he was stressed but didn’t want to die.

“You're going to be OK.” Liv said. “The doctors said you need to stay a day or so…until you have a successful bowel movement. They’ll get you up and walking tomorrow as long as there aren’t any complications.”

“I feel a bit nauseous.” He groaned.

“That’s probably the effects of anesthesia. You should go back to sleep. Today and tonight will be all about rest so you can get back on your feet quickly.”

“I don’t want to keep you from anything important.” Rafael said, closing his eyes.

“I'm the only place I want to be.” She took his hand and held it in both of hers. “Just rest, the morning will come before you know it.”

“I love you, Olivia.” He mumbled. “I know I tell you that every day, or maybe it’s implied but I should say it because you deserve to know how much you mean to me. I love you and my life wouldn’t be the same if weren't together. I promise that…”

He stopped talking just as fast as he started. He was knocked out now and Olivia sat there with an astonished look on her face. Did she know that he loved her? Yes, or she suspected as much. Did she ever expect him to say it? No, not really. 

She knew eventually she would either have to tell him herself or it would never happen. There were probably a million reasons why it probably shouldn’t but they all had to do with work. Liv took her job as a police sergeant very seriously but her personal life needed a serious boost. She was a mom now too and it didn’t scare Rafael away, even if he was still completely unsure of how to be a part of Noah’s life. It would all come together, they would come together, sooner rather than later.

“One day I'm going to remind you that you said it first.” Liv whispered, kissing his hand. “I love you too, Counselor.”

***


End file.
